Goodbye, Dubai

Our boat sets out from the Dibba port in Oman into the Arabian Sea. On a clear day it is possible to see Iran across the water, says our captain.

When we stop for our first snorkeling session I feel sorry for the local ladies in their all-covering religious robes. I join the French women and the men in marveling at the sea gardens.

The corals are surprisingly unspoilt and there are many varieties of large colourful fish all around us. My local chauffeur has become our snorkeling guide and stays too close for comfort.

Back on the boat I deliberately remove myself to the top deck in order to get away from the unwanted attention and to catch some sun away from the uncomfortable stares of the local women. I could never imagine not being able to wear a swimsuit, feel the sun on my skin and enjoy the snorkeling experience. This small freedom is also the main reason for eventually deciding not to marry my Arabian love.

After a lunch of local Arabic and Indian delicacies washed down with sweet tea, we visit a few more snorkeling sites where we see giant crabs and even find Nemo. While the kids learn to do a bit of fishing at our last stop, I retreat to the upper deck again and watch the sun set over the Hajar mountains. The scenery is desolate and I feel grateful that I had the chance to see how the vibrant underwater world contrasts with the land.

My grandmother always said ‘all’s well that ends well.’

I had many unspeakable experiences in Dubai but what’s the use of dwelling on them? Concentrating on the bad only invites more negativity. There was a time when I felt that I might be able to find an affinity with Dubai but then the moment passed and I finally didn’t like what I discovered.

Now I am happy to say that this last memory of a snorkelling trip to Oman during my life as a Dubai resident is a happy and peaceful one.

Exploring a day trip out of Dubai

During my last weekend in Dubai I decide to take a day trip to Oman, one of the most beautiful places to visit in the area and a popular excursion out of the city.

Most people drive out in their own 4x4s and even spend weekends exploring the plentiful wadis and oases in Oman, but for lack of my own car I book a snorkeling excursion with one of the many tour companies in Dubai.

With my luck I get picked up by one of the locals in his luxury 4x4: “All of the other guests are going in the tour bus but since you’re by yourself I thought I could give you a ride.”

A-hem, there’s almost nothing I can do in this city without some local trying to ‘save’ me from my singledom.

I get spoilt – chocolates, fruit and Omani chips (which is delightfully paprika flavoured). It’s a little nerve wracking as I subtly try to ward off his advances without offending. As a non-Muslim woman I am very aware that I don’t have many rights in this world.

The drive takes about two hours, including stops at the market and various historical sites along the way. Dubai residents don't need a special Omani visa to cross the border at Dibba in the Fujeirah Emirate.

When we get to the docks in Musandam on the other side of the border, I also get a tour of the luxury boats and an introduction to the Omani boat owners over very sweet tea. My chauffeur is meant to entertain a group of government officials for the day but promptly decides to join my tour instead.

When I step onto my snorkelling tour boat I introduce myself to the two families on board, one local Emirati family (all the women dressed in full abaya, all the men dressed in shorts and T-shirts) and one French family (all the women dressed in bikinis, all the men in only shorts). The local Omani boatmen look amused at my company.

This should be an interesting day…

Choos move me

Dubai Mall is eerily empty as I walk down its Fashion Avenue. I'm not sure if it's because of the recession or simply that this is a really huge mall and there are not enough people in Dubai to fill it.

Armani, Louis Vuitton, Dior... it's not Milan or Paris but the line-up will do. The shop assistants say sales have been really bad during this year's Summer Surprises shopping festival. The discounts have been incredible but yet on designer wear the price still remains high and it seems that people are holding on to their money during these financially unstable times.

I spot a Joe's café in between the designer shops and shriek in delight. This is the trendy foodie version of the fashion label Joseph and it offers lunch bites equally as satisfying as its jeans. Of course, at Joe's there will always be an extra chair at your table for your shopping bags - because designer bags should never go on the floor. I like that!

The Dubai Mall Fashion Avenue also boasts an Armani café (and they offer the only really good Italian style pizzas in Dubai - although it might just cost you more than actually flying to Italy) and a recently opened Fauchon, the designer pastry shop with Parisian origins.

It's such a thrill for me to spend time in these shops. I leave Alexander McQueen with real tears in my eyes because I lost my heart in there. Then I stop at Jimmy Choo. It's empty too, just the excuse I need to go and keep the shop assistant busy.

Trying these shoes on exhilarate me in the most amazing way. I'm wearing Choos. Real Choos, ah!

Summer in Dubai is disgusting

Every day on my way to work I pass the tallest building in the world and one of the largest shopping malls on earth. Today the sun is glistening off the shiny surface of the tower. I must admit, it's kind of beautiful.

I'm trying to concentrate on the good things that Dubai has to offer, since the summer sand storms, fog and 50 degree temperatures have me vomiting from physical discomfort. The malls are oases of air conditioning and I keep trying on designer wear to keep my spirits up, it's like therapy!

This is my first full Dubai summer. Last year this time I was gallavanting in Kyoto and Mauritius and wisely so. This kind of weather is enough to convince me once and for all that humans are not meant to live in the desert. My body is rebelling in every way - hayfever, heat rashes, exhaustion...

The sand is somehow sifting into my apartment and covering all my well chosen decorations with a thin layer of dust as though trying to make my life disappear. Suddenly I am questioning my decision to live here as I have never been this uncomfortable in my life. Is it worth it? Is life trying to test how much I would sacrifice for the opportunity to travel?

I vow to treasure every moment of my future that I get to spend in a leafy, mild environment. At least I am lucky enough to have options. Yet there are many people in Dubai for whom this is as good as it gets. Desperate people from unfortunate circumstances in the surrounding areas find salvation in Dubai - the ability to give their families a decent and stable life.

How people see and experience a place always depends on their own point of view and background. Clearly I have been so lucky, lucky, lucky in life but I also think that it is perhaps worth knowing what this kind of suffering feels like.

Making it through a summer in the desert woman alone will be one of my life's greatest achievements - but once is certainly enough. Where to next?

However fleeting, money can buy happiness in Dubai

Temporary happiness can indeed be bought. Simple things, such as fresh air, lush greenery and delicious food still provide a more pure pleasure. However, for lack of these natural assets in Dubai, the summer sales will definitely do.

Soaring temperatures and too much couch time finally forced me into the malls - and the Dubai Summer Surprises sales are exceptional this year. 70% off designer wear still makes it expensive, but, wow, keep it down to just a few choices and it becomes possible.

I have never been so mad for shopping. Ok, there was this one time in Barcelona about five years ago - but I'd prefer to blame that on my shopoholic friends, ha!

From the Mall of Emirates to Festival City Centre and Dubai Mall (the biggest mall in the world) I have laughed and cried over material things that have no real lasting value at all. I have felt the fabrics against my skin and soon found myself smitten with fashion items that may as well have been designed just for me.

Anna Sui, Alexander McQueen, Manolo Blahnik... God blessed some exceptional people with a generous helping of creativity. There are few things that pleasure the human condition as much as great design. Again, the best ideas are found in nature - but great minds create material things that make our lives easier, highlight our beauty, and make us fall in love.

I am having sleepless nights over a McQueen dress that I absolutely do not have an occasion for wearing, never mind the money. Yet what makes me feel even more delirious is that it is possible in this world to create things that make people like me feel like this.

Meeting God outside the mosque

Just a couple of months ago I thought that my spiritual journey ended with finding love. Little did I know it was just another part of the path towards enlightenment.

After travelling through the Buddhist temples in Thailand, Sri Lanka and Hong Kong as well as Mother Theresa's Missionaries of Charity and the Vatican City, I fell in love with a Muslim and discovered Islam.

For me this was a strong push back towards the moral values that I was taught as a child and proceeded to throw out the door when my parents got divorced. It's really not that easy to find a genuinely good man in this world and I felt like I could finally be myself again.

I really like religion although the politics and propaganda of religion disgusts me. Yet simply following spiritual practices is not really substantial enough and I had been feeling for a while that I need to make some solid decisions on my religious status.

Being faced with a very religious partner was a good enough reason for me to do some soul searching and be truly honest with myself in this matter for the first time in more than ten years.

I have a curious nature and I like to find things out for myself much rather than being told. So I read books and had many arguments with people of strong faith in different powers. I prayed a lot and asked for guidance without really being sure whether this God that I am praying to is really the same God for everyone.

The mosque in Abu Dhabi looks like a mirage from a distance, through the dust. It's the second largest mosque in the world after the one in Mecca. I anticipated going inside and having a similar sense of peace that I experienced before in cathedrals and temples around the world. Instead we arrive just a little too late for the strict non-Muslim visiting hours and get turned away.

This was the tipping point for me after grappling with many issues for a while - being shown away from an Islamic holy place to which I travelled willingly. I felt rejected by Islam even before I had the chance to accept or reject it myself. That's it, I thought, I would never be good enough for this.

In the end spirituality remains a very personal thing but I can say today with confidence that I live a life without boundaries in the love of God. I don't have to earn my way into any church or any heaven and I don't have to feel inferior for just being me.

I'm an alien in Abu Dhabi

For me travelling is all about learning to understand the world better. Different cultures and languages can provide so much insight into how different people approach life. Yet sometimes the angles from which different people view the world can be so foreign that it becomes hard to absorb.

It's also interesting how it is always the little things in life and not the big things that make the most difference. In my relationship with Mohammed we could respect each other's spiritual and cultural differences but the little things got us into such a tangle that we eventually had to realise love is not enough of a foundation to build a life on.

Things that I never thought twice about became the focus of very different opinions. I thought I could learn something, that this relationship could help me grow and help to make a small difference in reconciling the hostility between different religions. However, things are much more complicated than they seem to be at face value.

Although we may all be more the same than we are different our differences can also create such vast spaces between us that they become near impossible to cross. It's easy to say anything for love but when it comes down to actually making that change it's a whole different story.

I happened upon this scene of a traditional Arabic couple at the Heritage Village on the beach in Abu Dhabi, only one hour's drive from Dubai. Somehow it made me feel sad to see them sitting there fully covered and unable to feel the sun and the sand and the sea water on their skin. Since then I haven't been able to shake this uncomfortable feeling.

It's hard for me to understand 'not doing' as I choose to 'do' - and try and make mistakes and then try something else; to learn and to live life to the full. As someone who has been able to make sense out of many crazy life experiences, this completely normal local custom still leaves me baffled and confused.

Facing fear at the fun fair

Amidst fears of financial ruin and swine flu, there’s still more than enough fun to go around these days. Flight specials and holiday packages are priced better than ever and I can now rent a car for AED10 per day in Dubai.

Yes, I’m back in the desert and ready to face the heat. Temperatures are soaring up to mid-40s already and I have bought myself a yellow Latika shawl (you know, like the one she wears in Slumdog Millionaire’s Bollywood scene). It’s my favourite accessory for summer already and I keep it handy in my Moroccan leather bag for whenever I need to step into the sun.

After sunset, when the heat becomes more bearable, the waterfront area at Fesitival City is one of my favourite areas in Dubai. It’s a lovely place to walk and admire the yachts or the skyline. After a dinner of soup de l’oignon and Chardonnay at Bistro Madeleine along the water, my friend Prasanti spots the fun fair in the distance and promptly decides that it’s time to give the child inside free reign.

I vow to go on the ferris wheel only, since my tolerance level for roller coasters is not very high. The horror evoked by everyday life is enough for me; I don’t need to pay for anxiety. Prasanti has a different plan though and before I know it I am on one of these scary rides. To the kids’ amusement I yell at the top of my lungs and a lifetime of pent up screams seem to come out all at once.

Glad to have my feet on the ground again, I look at Prasanti, giggling.

“Well then, I guess no more rides...” she says.

True enough, but what a perfect reminder that it’s possible to push through fear and come out just fine on the other side. We market fear as fun, with roller coasters, movies and extreme sports. Then we may as well try and use it to our benefit in real life too.

My castle in the sand

If you’re anything like me you need to be surrounded by beautiful things in order to survive. Perhaps this has something to do with the fact that my hometown of Cape Town is one of the most visually stunning cities in the world.

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist then to figure out that Dubai did not sit well with me when I moved here one and a half years ago. I was but too happy to get out on my many work trips. Recently I changed jobs though and had the chance to move into my own place. The best part was that I got to decorate it from scratch and create my own beautiful space in this aesthetically disappointing city.

Of course it is not easy to maintain what is beautiful about Dubai because there is just so much sand everywhere. What is being done is admirable though: plants are rinsed regularly (yes, really) and dirty cars are not tolerated. No matter how much it takes to remain dust free, cleanliness is kept in its rightful place next to godliness.

Unfortunately, when sand gets blown around a bit it blots out all these efforts in a similar way that smog makes it hard to get a sharp photograph in Beijing. Yesterday’s sand storm (see picture) made me feel really smug inside my new home, in the same way that Londoners were recently taking pleasure in central heating and cosy couches during the snowfall.

It was fun giving the interior designer in me her five minutes of fame. Especially since I found some real bargains at this year’s Dubai Shopping Festival, Ikea and the furniture shops in Sharjah, an Emirate adjacent to Dubai. Once the big things were sorted out, my Mohammed put up the lamps I bought in Vietnam, the painting from Guangzhou and a shelf on which to display my souvenirs from Moscow, Kyoto and Colombo.

To be completely honest, the dust still suffocates me when I walk out the door. Yet coming home to a place that inspires and invigorates me makes up for the sand pit outside. Similarly I will never stop missing my view of Table Mountain but being able to afford a fancy TV is also an experience that I am relishing right now.

Dubai on a budget

Money doesn’t get a lot of respect in Dubai in general. Things are unreasonably expensive here but most people have enough not to make a big deal out of it. Ferrari’s and Hummers are a common sight on the crammed highways and if you judge by the occasional till queues you’d think designer shops are supermarkets.

Most companies pay their staff a decent salary so it isn’t hard to get by for the average employee. However, running into problems with money makes Dubai almost unliveable for some.

Since minor health problems have prevented me from working fulltime during the last few months I have been on a pretty tight budget recently. Much of my time was spent catching up on my DVD education and reading books that have been left untouched on my bookshelf.

Yet in the end we all need to get out, mingle and find some action. What I have discovered (with a little help from the new man in my life) is that there are more than a few simple things to enjoy in this bling world.

For instance, the cost of food varies hugely in Dubai. Of course, it is a desert and most things have to be imported so it becomes very expensive. Yet there are also certain products that come from lush neighbouring countries so it’s always worth comparing prices. For instance, melons from Oman, strawberries from Egypt and bananas from Pakistan are pretty cheap compared to fruits imported from the US, Australia and even Europe.

Interestingly enough the Gulf News recently reported that there’s a new trend taking the world by storm called locavorism. Fuelled by the recession, people now have a new found passion for local food; the more local the better, cheaper and healthier for you.

Same goes for restaurants in Dubai. Italian food costs a lot more than Lebanese or Indian and it’s worth looking out for small little cafes with delicious fare rather than going for places with fancy interiors and less fanciful food.

Street cafes worth a visit are Zeyara Cafeteria in Abu Hail area where they make delicious home style burgers and the best fresh fruit juice in town. My favourite is a prawn sandwich with a spicy mayonnaise for around AED 4 ($1). Even Dubai’s rich and famous pass by here to pick up karak (cardamom) tea for around AED 1 ($0.2) per cup – not because it’s that cheap but because it’s that good.

In the same area there is a street café called Fatayer Alla Attayer which makes Lebanese pastries. It's the perfect place to visit on the way to Al Mamzar beach to pick up snacks for a picnic while enjoying the lovely Dubai winter weather.

Other than that the current Dubai Shopping Festival is offering incredible discounts. I bought trousers for just about AED 30 ($8) from City Centre a few days ago and then went to see a ‘buy one get one free’ movie at the cinema there.

Yet, if all else fails and city life becomes just a little too expensive, there's nothing better than heading off into the desert and camping out under the stars after watching the big red sunset. Bonding over a campfire is priceless indeed.

Encountering a divine accident

Lately I have been spending a lot more time than usual in Dubai. The reason for this is that I have developed some recurring ear pressure problems that make it increasingly difficult for me to be a frequent flyer (hence the less frequent blog posts: sorry).

During the time that I have been stuck here in the desert I have not only discovered the heart of Dubai but I have also lost my heart. In fact, I am 29 years old and I feel as though I am in love for the first time. All I know for sure is that I have never felt this way before.

Yes, I have had butterflies in my stomach and I have loved deeply. I have even experienced a kind of fairy tale complete with a castle in Edinburgh and the promise of our own one in the French countryside - but the perfect prince ended up being a toad after all.

This love, however, struck me down like a thunderbolt. The earth moved. Literally. On the 10th of September the tremors of an earthquake in Iran shook Dubai and I thought that I was losing my mind. For weeks I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep and I could hardly speak or breathe in his presence.

Two months later I am still filled with wonder. This is what it should feel like. Yet, in life’s characteristically ironic way, there is a catch. He is from a Muslim culture while I grew up in a Christian home. How could it be that we come from such different backgrounds but have grown towards the exact same place in body and mind?

Perhaps love is not supposed to be easy. While staying together may be a choice love itself is not. It is a force of nature like the sunrise, the tides and the phases of the moon. I understand this now for the first time.

I feel like I am part of something much bigger than just the two of us. Christians and Muslims have been known to kill each other for centuries and yet the only thing that is stronger than hate is love.

My journey has taken me past a thousand Middle Eastern mosques to the biggest and the smallest Buddhas in the world, to Mother Theresa’s Missionaries of Charity and the Vatican City.

It has been a spiritually rich journey that guided me towards love - a love that, in its own humble way, may help to heal the world. What more could I have wished for?

A place in the sun

‘So good to be home,’ I think as I arrive at Dubai’s shiny new Terminal 3.

It's state-of the-art, easy to navigate and when I get into the taxi it actually smells nice. Perhaps it really is just trial and error and the fact that I can see city improvements in the year and a half that I have been based here is very encouraging.

Funny that I have grown so attached to this city. It just shows you how adaptable us human beings can be. Initially I couldn’t identify with anything or anyone and now I have already made friends and discovered places where I enjoy hanging out.

Now I am trapped between two worlds, as often happens with people that relocate to a different country. Every time I’m back in my old hometown I feel like I never want to leave Cape Town and when I’m in Dubai I feel like this is home too.

All things considered, you have to admit that Dubai is a good place to be right now. In an unstable and dangerous world, it provides a safe and financially secure haven for people from all different cultures. My friends are Thai, Brazilian, German, Greek, Emirati, Saudi, French, Serbian, Indian, Maltese, Mauritian…

However confusing and volatile a fusion of cultures could prove to be, it is also enriching and if we allow it to, it may even help us dissolve our mental blocks towards 'the other'. Dubai is Sheikh Rashid’s rainbow nation, just the same way that South Africa is Madiba’s.

However, Dubai is proof that people need rules. Only within a structured society can human beings find freedom. With too many rights and too few rules come chaos as can be seen in South Africa today.

I find it comforting to live in a country where things like gambling and prostitution are illegal. Of course, everything is still to be found everywhere in the world but the fact that the government tries to protect society against their own weakness is something that I have grown to appreciate.

Although I cannot see the sky, it looks like I have finally found my place in the sun and it is certainly the last place that I thought it would be: right in front of my eyes.

10 things I love about Dubai

Dubai has certainly been a difficult city for me to get used to. The initial culture shock got the better of me for a while, but after a year there are also certain things that I have grown to love...

1. The desert sunset
The dusty sky gives the sun and the moon a smouldering presence like amber or coal.

2. The creek
Besides the dhows that bring a touch of authenticity to a fake city, there's just something about calm water that makes me happy. Dubai's city lights being reflected at night is an extra bonus.

3. The tax free shopping
Dubai is not the kind of city where you can expect to find cheap stuff, but show me a girl that can resist saving a good deal on something expensive!

4. The Middle Eastern delicacies
Pomegranates, pistachios, dates, rosewater, falafel, halwa, hommous, cinnamon tea...

5. Femininity is respected
Ok, Islamic law may not allow women many rights, but women are shown many special courtesies such as being served before men at the bank.

6. The local hospitality
The Emiratis treat their guests very well in general. They love their city and are always willing to help tourists and expats alike.

7. Tradition is preserved
While American culture has swamped many other places in the world, the Emiratis still take pride in wearing their traditional dress despite the 80% expat majority. It is also heartwarming to see how central the family remains to local culture. In the West it has become too easy to get divorced or never marry and end up lonely.

8. The vision
There are probably many other wiser ways to spend the money but creating a bustling metropolis in the middle of the desert - never mind islands in the sea - is innovative.

9.Living a spoilt life
Lazing around at the spa is a perfectly acceptable way to spend he day, supermarkets deliver to your doorstep for free and the credit crunch may as well be a chocolate bar.

10. It's in the middle of the world...
... which makes it a perfect base to travel from.

10 things I hate about Dubai

Since we’re in the month of Ramadan, leisure options are currently spread thinly in the Middle East. What to do, what to do? So I’ve decided to use the time to think carefully about those little things in Dubai that I just cannot make peace with. After one year of being based here, there are still many. Ready? Here goes…

1.) The traffic
Need I say more? Hopefully the city planners are working on a speedy solution.

2.) The taxis
After waiting four hours in a taxi queue the last thing you feel like is marrying the driver. Especially if it smells like there’s a bucket of pooh under his seat and you get home with whiplash.

3.) The exorbitant prices
Last week I paid around $40 for six months worth of bank statements. Daylight robbery!

4.) The lack of fresh food
Ok, I know, it’s the desert and everything has to be imported and kept cool but it’s just so sad to see those tired tomatoes on the shelves.

5.) The rude children
“My son does not speak to slaves,” one local mother told me after a kid threw something at me when I approached him. I’ve been called many names before but that was a first.

6.) The censored media
While many websites are blocked here, the most interesting pages in the local newspapers are the lifestyle supplements and recipes. Go figure.

7.) The lack of labour laws
I have listened to many sad expat stories and it doesn’t matter how much money you pay someone if you take away their humanity. But - labour unions are considered treason.

8.) The strict laws that gets Westerners behind bars every day
Drugs such as codeine which is available over the counter in many countries, is illegal in Dubai and can get travellers in jail. As will trace amounts of recreational drugs on your clothes. What’s more, in a rape case there is a danger of the victim being tried as a prostitute or homosexual.

9.) The unequal treatment of foreigners
While the 80% expat community keeps Dubai running, they will always come second to the locals who often gets away with committing crimes, even against foreigners.

10.) The superficiality
Artificial beaches, islands, boobs, chickens and even fake friends. In an increasingly cold digital world, it's no wonder that this city is becoming so popular.

Wow, it really feels good to get that off my chest. Perhaps now I can start working on a list of ten things (I will scratch until I find ten) I love about Dubai. Watch this space.

What is there to see around the UAE?

Unless spending money is no issue, a holiday in Dubai can probably become frustrating. There are loads of malls and markets as well as luxurious bars and restaurants to choose from, but I knew that my family would be shopped and eaten out by the first day or two.

Of course, Dubai offers many beach options and fun parks, but it is probably not the preferred destination for a beach holiday or go-karting. And while the ski dome in the desert is a must-see, my family are not skiers and a glance through the windows of the Mall of the Emirates was enough to quench their curiosity.

A desert safari is also a something any holidaymaker should experience in the Middle East but it only covers half a day - and so I phoned around to find out what kind of day trips are available in and around the UAE.

First up was a family outing to the wadi in Hatta with Oasis Palm Tours. Now, I thought rock pools in the mountains mean lush green scenery but boy was I disappointed. I had never seen so much rock before and so little life. Somewhere in the middle of this nothingness there is a big pool of clear water that disappears into the rocks.

Sadly, this sight that should have been pristine is ruined by the huge amount of graffiti around there.

The tour begins with some dune bashing and ends with lunch at a lovely resort. Not bad, but I preferred the bus tour with Arabian Adventures which took us out to Fujeirah, a seaside Emirate. We even crossed over into the small town of Dibba in Oman, where I had my best meal in the Middle East up to date. The food that we enjoyed at the Golden Tulip Resort was surprisingly fresh and well flavoured. This would make a great base for a diving trip. Now I just need to sort out my PADI!

The tour was very educational and I got to see my first real oasis. So much green... like a massage for my eyes. The only downside was the attitude of the tour guide. She was so unenthusiastic, I wanted to grab her microphone and go: "Look, there is Snoopy island, it's a great spot for snorkelling!"

We visited the ruins of the Fujeirah fort on the way back to Dubai and I found it quite shocking to learn from the tour operators that these buildings are being rebuilt to resemble their original state on top of the ruins. I guess here people think differently: why preserve the old when it can simply be recreated?

A week filled up pretty quickly and I never even got to take my family to Al Ain (which is also an oasis) or even Abu Dhabi, the island capital of the UAE. So then, there is more to explore around here than I thought albeit not good for a woman to go around alone. I will have to invite my family for another holiday.

Seeing Dubai through a man's eyes

The Middle East is clearly a man's world. After being based in Dubai for nine months I am still desperately searching for things to love about this place - at the moment my list is restricted to (1) the red sunsets (2) the tax free shopping and (3) the creek at night. Yet, when the men in my life visited me here recently, they were well impressed with this 'city of the future'.

My brother couldn't stop taking pictures of the Hummers and Ferrari's, while the latest gadgets in the electronics stores kept him amused for hours.

"This city is so cool. I wish I could live here," he said.

I booked a couple of excursions for us with Oasis Palm Tours and especially the city tour was really good value. If we had to cover all that distance with a taxi it would have cost us at least three times as much. The tour covered all the forts, souqs, beaches and architectural highlights and even took us to some specialist stores where we could buy Middle Eastern treasures at fair prices.

My father's favourite outing was the Desert Safari. All that dune bashing had me feeling a little ill, but the boys were having great fun. At least I got to see my red sunset over the desert from the back of a camel.

The package included a mezze dinner at an open air venue in the middle of the desert and while the food was delicious, the belly dancer was a bit disappointing. Once again, the men enjoyed the visual delight immensely, but personally I found her dancing skills less than impressive.

To see Dubai through my family's eyes were great fun and they even bought me a cashmere scarf at the souq, which is certainly one treasure a woman can relish in this male playground.

All packed and nowhere to go

Have time, will travel - but wherever I turned doors, roads and flight options closed.

I couldn’t get a visa for Paris. Then I looked at flights to South East Asia, South Africa and North Africa but they were either too full or too expensive.

So I decided to discover the UAE a bit. Get out there. Go to an oasis or something.

However, it rained so much here that the roads became rivers and the traffic became, well, somewhere I didn’t want to be.

Obviously I was not meant to go anywhere. So I surrendered to my fate and did what all the expats in Dubai do best with their free time: eat, party and watch TV.

Until the rain stopped and the roads cleared and I decided to go ‘traveling’ at Global Village, a theme park in Dubai which is divided into all the different countries in the world, complete with souvenirs and local food.

Perhaps I expected too much but I was greatly disappointed. It’s not as cheap as everyone said, although many of the souvenirs are cheap plastic products and clothes. There is also not much variety and the whole place, in general, lacks energy and soul.

I guess the richness of history and culture, people and crafts is not something that can be replicated so easily. No money in the world can recreate myths and legends, or what places smell like, taste like and feel like.

Living in the middle of the world makes a decent base to travel from, under normal circumstances, but it is certainly not a magical one.

The day Bush bashed my Paris plans

The eternal optimist in me doesn’t cancel the ticket to Paris. Instead I keep checking the French consulate’s website just in case there is a cancellation so I can jump on it and get my visa in time.

Then, just as miraculously as the rain that is falling here in the desert, it happens. An appointment opens up on Monday at 9am. So I book it, print the receipt and spend the night tossing and turning in excitement and anticipation, with 'Lady Marmelade' ringing in my head.

What I don’t realize is that fate is already laughing at me, sending me on another seesaw ride of hope and disappointment. When the taxi eventually gets to the turnoff towards the consulate building, the road is closed – same as most of the other roads in Dubai this morning.

So I phone the consulate and somewhere in the recorded French message I pick up the word ‘ferme,’ closed. The darkness closes in again and blacks out my visions of a catwalk show and a hotel close to the Moulin Rouge.

Most part of the city looks like a ghost town as we try to make it back to my apartment, the taxi and I. The only other people in the streets are the security guards who monitor the blocked roads with eagle eyes.

“Sorry but you can’t go back now,” says the taxi driver, “the roads are all closed.”

“Ok, then just drop me off at a shopping centre,” I say, feeling confused and drained. Why did they give me the appointment if they were going to be closed?

“The shopping centres are also closed. President Bush arrives at 9. So today like public holiday. Everything closed.”

I end up spending most of the day at a coffee shop, drinking coffee I don’t really feel like and staring out into the empty streets.

The whole city closed down for Bush’s arrival. All the streets. All the shops. All the consulates. The authorities declared today a public holiday at the last minute, to ensure the US president’s safety in this Muslim city where Al Qaeda is rumoured to be based and do their banking.

How many lives of little people like me has this big man affected? I just lost my last chance of getting to Paris. It could be worse. It could always be worse. Some others have lost their lives.

Should I marry a Sheikh for Chanel?

It has been just a little more than six months since I last went to Paris and my senses are longing for this place.

So I book a few days’ holiday, a plane ticket and a hotel. I even have a ticket for a show, since my off days are going to be during fashion week, an exclusive event in the city of "lights...? models...? guest list...?"

But alas, the magic is not meant for me. Not this time. The French Consulate in Dubai has been busy. Perhaps all the Sheikhs’ wives are on their way to pick Chanel garments off the catwalk. Hm, maybe I really should take up that Sheikh I met on his invitation “for a drink, or something…”

I called them (the consulate, not the Sheiks’ wives) to find out whether they can process an express visa for me and/ or what to do about finding an appointment but, in true French hospitality, the ‘monsieur’ on the other side of the line put the phone down in my ear.

Which reminds me of the difference in rudeness between the French and the Emiratis. The French are rude in a pompous sort of way. They seem to get much satisfaction out of creating problems and being intimidating. The Emiratis, in turn, simply have complete disregard for anyone or anything other than themselves.

Well, so much for making me feel welcome. This disappointment makes me appreciate how freely my job in the travel industry allows me to cross borders. Hopefully this job will take me to Paris again soon.

A walk in Dubai

Determined as I am to enjoy the mild winter sunshine in Dubai, I decide to head for (possibly) the only places one can walk in this city: the souqs.

Dubai is designed for driving, with no sidewalks and few pedestrian crossings. I’ve insisted on walking before and found myself sinking knee deep into the desert sand while cars swoosh past dangerously.

No, today I will head for a souq area where there are indeed some sidewalks and markets to stroll through. Since I find cheap electronics and fake designer handbags somewhat uninspiring by now, I figure that it is time for me to visit the spice souq.

I get out of the taxi next to the creek where traditional dhows float lazily, but the otherworldly aromas quickly steal me away from the sight.

One whiff of a dried lime and I am all eyes and nose and ears.

“Taste this, its dried figs from Iran. And these are the best dates in the region. Good, aren’t they? Oh, you have to have some of these cashews too…”

The shopkeepers are so enthusiastic about their produce and my senses fill up with bags of tiny dried lavender, rose and chamomile flowers, giant slabs of frankincense from Oman, saffron from Iran and just about any spice I can think of.

“That’s too expensive. I live here, if you give me a good price I will come back” I say when one shopkeeper tries to cheat me out of cash.

“In that case I will give it to you for a kiss,” he dares me, quite seriously too.

I stuff the money I was willing to pay into his hand with an equally serious ‘no’ and he nods in acceptance. As I walk away I suddenly become aware of the fact that I am a woman alone amidst curious stares.

If I keep lagging behind the groups of tourists I should be fine. I make it past two museums, linger through the gold and perfume souqs and then head back to the creek where I catch a taxi at dusk.

Ah, I am thrilled with the cinnamon, coffee, cashmere and sapphires I touched, tasted and eyed today. What’s more, I went for a walk in Dubai (yes, really) all by myself and it was great.